As I was growing up in a house full of girls, what a boy’s world was like never crossed my mind. As a little girl, they were just those gross and dirty people in school that loved to make fun of girls and pull our hair. As a teenager, they were still pretty dirty, but fun to talk to and sometimes too cute to approach. Then in college they were still fun to talk to, if not more so, and had managed to clean themselves up a bit. Even when I was first married, the things that people would say about how different boys are than girls never occurred to me because my husband was and is one of the most respectful and self-sufficient people I have ever met.  He picked up after himself, did all of the cooking until I was able to stay home with the kids (and I had no choice but to learn) and made sure everything was always nice and in working order for everyone. He has never been a slob, so I do not expect our children to be rude or gross…when they grow up.

For now, here are ten signs that prove that I am living in boys’ world.

1. Actually knowing the difference between loaders, excavators and backhoes. As far as I was concerned these were all construction vehicles.

The need to know more was never an issue. In fact, it wasn’t until my now 4 year old started asking about the differences between the big diggers and little diggers were that I even realized they were different in any way at all. Yes, they are all diggers to me. I mean isn’t that is basically what they do? So thanks to my sweet little ones, I have learned some new terminology that I am sure will come in handy one day. Right?

2. Any cars and trucks will be crashed and thrown. Down stairs, slides, couches chairs, tables, desks, or really any elevated surface.

I don’t know what it is about watching things fall, but I thought this would stop being fun once they saw that the same thing happened every-single-time. But, watching things crash and then cheering is the best thing ever for little boys to do on a daily basis. Be careful when walking past a flight of stairs if your kids are being too quiet. More than likely, they are planning for the next spectacular crash without any worry of casualties.

3. Makeup and perfumes have been replaced with first aid kit and stain removers in the must-have list.

I don’t know why they like to play stunt man, but they do. All of the jumps, falls, pretend fires and explosions put quite a strain on their sensitive skin and clothes. Though a stain remover won’t fix tears, it does help get rid of the evidence of a sword fight between brothers whose swords happened to be markers, pens or even paint brushes.

4. Your dream of a beautiful arts and crafts corner with a year’s worth of supplies has become a shelf full of mostly empty paints and used up glitter glues.

My arts and craft nook is now a high shelf to keep everything out of reach of curious little hands. And the supply dies usually in one session due to them becoming explosions and fireworks that land mostly on their arms, legs and faces. This, of course, takes us back to thanking the inventor of the stain remover.

5. You no longer have the option of running away from bugs (unless they are wasps and bees) and now you must forcibly remove them from little fingers and mouths.

It started out innocently enough; my youngest would spot a rollie pollies and be fascinated by just watching it. Then he decided to touch them, then hold them, then squeeze them (yuk) and lastly taste them. Ugh, my stomach turns every time. I’m just glad I haven’t thrown up…yet. I don’t ever remember a time when I saw a bug and thought, “I wonder what that tastes like” but then again, I was in a house full of girls and we usually avoided bugs at all costs. To this day I run in the opposite direction of bees and wasps. My husband laughs at me but if I didn’t do that, I’m sure my boys would have already tried to catch one. Instead, they avoid them as well because mama does. Thank goodness for small miracles.

6. If you ever sit on the ground to be at their level, they will wrestle you to the ground just because they can.

There is something about being on the floor that just makes them feel so strong and they want to show you just how much. Next time you are with a group of boys, sit on the floor and time how long this takes. If they are your family, it will only take a minute or two. On the plus side, I can say I have gotten really good at doing sit-ups.  That is they knock me down, I sit back up, they knock me down I sit back up, they knock me down, I sit back up and on and on and on. Pretty good exercise, I suppose. I should be in fantastic shape with an amazing six pack.  If only it were that easy, sigh.

7. When wearing summer clothes, you worry about how many bruises will show from being a human jungle gym.

As long as nobody thinks negatively of said bruises, I can live with them but they are so not sexy. And in a weird way, I think my legs sometimes match my kids which are covered with bruises from their stuntman activities previously listed. Sure it looks bad, but we managed to have a lot of fun while getting the bruises as they climbed all over me, jumped on me, knocked me down, used me as a step ladder to reach my face or whatever acrobatic feat they were attempting at the time.

8. Making music with their mouths, bodies or anything else that is not technically an instrument is just as good as the pile of actual musical instruments they have.

We have a table full of keyboards, drums, horns, bells and whistles. We have guitars and ukuleles just the right size for little hands. Do they get used as often as I would like? No because hitting their heads works just as good as a drum. Do you have your silverware in a drawer? That is a whole drum set, don’t you know? I’m not going to lie, though, when they play any instrument (or pretend instruments), it is music to my ears and I love it. To the trained ear this may sound like horrible noise devoid of any harmony, but to me it’s a symphony. It is at least for a few minutes.

 9. Never a quiet moment, unless they are away or sleeping.

I’ve heard mothers of girls say they have a lot of times when the girls sit quietly and play or draw.  I can’t even imagine that with my kids. They wake up signing and they chatter, scream, perform, cry ask questions and talk the whole day through. I am very glad they are so vocal and so confident in what they have to say, but holly smokes I didn’t even remember what silence was until they both started going to school two days a week. Now, I don’t know what to do with myself. I think it is way too quiet.

10. Always feeling like the most beautiful woman in the world, because in their eyes you are for now.

I think they got this from their papa, but they are becoming quite the smooth talkers. There isn’t a day that goes by when they don’t call me beautiful mama, gorgeous or tell me how much they love me. It almost makes you forget how crazy the rest of the times are. They really do boost my confidence even when I am not feeling, or even close to looking my best. Again, I give all the credit for this to my wonderful husband because he makes me feel beautiful everyday as well. Boys have a magic ability to make it all feel alright.

I am so thankful I get to experience it all with them, my beautiful sweet, sometimes stinky, sometimes sticky, sometimes clumsy, loud, fun loving and passionate boys. The hugs and kisses they shower you with are proof of how wonderful a boys’ world really is. I can’t wait to see what other crazy adventures we get into as they grow bigger. They are still toddlers so I can only imagine that this list will grow substantially as they do. If you are living with boys, what are the signs that shine through in your own boys’ world?

:: Are you a boy mom, a girl mom, or both? ::