When I first embarked on my journey of mercy, it was concept seemed simple to me; embrace and help those in need, those less fortunate. This seemed like an obvious concept to teach to our children. What I’ve learned is that mercy is truly so much more than that.
Mercy for others is not only a basic compassion but a forgiveness to those that wrong you, whether they have asked for it or not.
I struggle so much with this. I hold grudges, there I said it, not proud of it but I do. But mercy means loving others no matter what. It means not hurting people even if they have hurt you, and giving infinite second chances. It also transcends to those cases when it is easy to do harm to others.
I see this a lot as a middle school teacher. There are real cases of mean girls and boys in this world. I am not sure where and when judging others starts but it is definitely a learned trait, infants don’t do this.
A few weeks ago at the neighborhood park a little boy commented to his friend that my son was weird because of the thing on his head (his hearing aid). Even though my son didn’t hear this, my momma bear self was about to pounce and bring some education to these boys before my husband calmly reminded to show mercy. I just couldn’t believe a child so young was already judging another in a negative way. It hurt my heart, not necessarily for my son, but for our society.
It is us too ladies! We have heard or acknowledged how women behave like we are still in high school and the reality is that we probably all have because it is easy to. It is easy to judge or even demonize someone. You misinterpret everything they do or twist it to fit a picture you have of them or take it personally. It is hard to work on a relationship, it is hard to accept that everyone has good in them, it is hard to look past our own conceptions or insecurities and see the person they really are or are working to be, but it is so worth it. Mercy opens your heart and your eyes to empowering possibilities and why would we not want that for our sons, our daughters, and ourselves.
Just as important if not more is mercy for ourselves. We often talk about how to teach our children that it is okay to fail. It is a hard life lesson that tests you and can either help you grow or stunt your growth. This continues on our journeys as adults and as mothers.
The truth is that we have all failed as women and mothers at some point or will. That is okay. In fact I’d go a step further and say that it is a good thing! I have failed in my journey of embracing mercy (see previously mentioned story!), but it is in our failure that we learn and grow. It is after the storm that we rebuild even stronger. It is easy to get into a rut. But there are no situations we cannot get out of, we are not condemned to sink into quicksand. We have to be willing to give ourselves infinite chances and know we deserve them!
Understanding that forgiveness to ourselves and others is always a choice. Teaching our children in the power to see the merciful choice can set them up for so many opportunities in life. What greater lesson is there for our children and for us to learn for others, for ourselves, and for the world than mercy? In our world today how much could our society benefit if we all showed more mercy?
