big kid

My son was born at a pretty average size for a baby. He was 7 pounds 9 ounces and 19 inches long. Like I said, average. However, he was also two weeks early.

We all know just how much babies grow in the last few weeks in utero. I shudder to think just how much bigger he could have been if I had gone to full term, or heaven forbid, past my due date.

Throughout his life he has been above the 50th percentile in height. Most of the time he has been above the 75th percentile and generally hovers somewhere between the 80th-90th percentile.

At 16 months old, my child is now the height and weight of most 2-3 year olds.

None of this is that big of a deal except for some minor inconveniences. For example, when he steps on my foot I get a legit bruise because he’s so heavy. Or the fact that I’ll probably have to move him into a toddler bed way earlier than expected because he will be able to climb out of his crib soon. I also have to keep a towel handy in the kitchen because he can reach the water spout on the refrigerator and delights in trying to refill his sippy cup.

The biggest worry I have about having a big kid though is that people will expect him to be more advanced mentally because of his big size. This worry comes into play mostly when we are surrounded by other children.

At playgrounds I find myself constantly explaining my son’s age to other parents. My husband once thought it was because I was bragging about his taller than average height, but that’s not it at all.

I tell parents that he’s big for his age because I want them to understand that my child still doesn’t quite grasp general societal rules. He doesn’t understand the whole what’s your toy is your toy thing. He also doesn’t understand personal space yet either. This can sometimes result in him walking up to other kids and grabbing their nose or something silly like that. Then I have to rush in and apologize to the other kid and their parents while trying to pry my 16 month old away.

I have to explain him to other parents so they won’t give me crazy eyes when I climb onto jungle gyms with him. Although he climbs fairly well, he doesn’t really look at all of his surroundings. He climbs those jungle gyms with reckless abandon and is pretty much always an accident waiting to happen.

I have to explain that, no my child is not being mean when he seemingly ignores your kid. He just doesn’t really talk yet and is still only 16 months old. He doesn’t understand play in the way that 2 or 3 year olds do.

Most of the time people are very understanding, but sometimes if I don’t get the chance to explain his age I get some very judgmental looks. Nothing hurts more than seeing someone give my baby the judgey eyes.

I don’t know if my kid will always be big. He may eventually even out one day. My gut tells me probably not, but I guess we won’t know until we get there. Either way, no matter what his size, I will always be there to protect him. Even if he grows to be 6 foot 2, mom will always have his back. And hey, who knows, I could one day have a star basketball player on my hands.

Veronica DeSantos Ryan
Hi Austin mamas! I am Veronica DeSantos Ryan, a mama from Round Rock. My husband and I moved to the area in 2014 and love every minute of it. Our baby Oliver (May 2016) is the light of our life and we are enjoying every minute with him. After spending seven years teaching, I decided that I wanted to be a stay at home mom and teacher of life to my little boy. As a family we love running with Ollie in his jogger stroller, having picnics outside, playing with our two dogs and exploring all the the Austin area has to offer! I am also a performing princess for Lexi's Little Princesses Princess company, a teaching artist at The Georgetown Palace Theatre, and a member of the singing group The Vintage Dreams. I am an avid reader, piano player, singer, and occasional actress in community theater, and have recently been published in Chicken Soup for the Soul: Miracles and More.

3 COMMENTS

  1. Ha I have a big kid too–100th percentile all around–and someone asked why I needed a stroller for him because it was a place where a stroller seemed inconvenient and “Couldn’t he just walk?” Hi, no, he’s six months old. Thanks though. My oldest was a big kid too, and has since leveled off, but I’ve always wondered why people don’t slow down and actually look at a kid before getting judgy, because it’s usually fairly obvious when a baby is a baby, even if they are big.

  2. The only problem I’ve ever had with my youngest (I only have two) being a big kid (and my oldest small), is that people constantly are mentioning how close they are in age and that I have my hands full. I don’t like those kinds of comments and don’t make them anyway, but my children are 2+ years apart, not the less than a year people think.

  3. I’ll tell you, it’s no easier further down the road. My daughter was born 2 weeks early also. She was 7’6 and 21 inches. She has never been under the 90 percentile for weight or 100th for height since. She is the height of the average 12 year old but she is 10. She is the tallest, and youngest in her class. On the soccer field two rather nasty moms behind me commented on her size and awkward gait and then said she obviously was held back and that she should play her age group not her school grade group… (I almost lost my mind on them!) there will always be judgy people… I constantly am saying “yes she is tall for her age” about both my girls… but hey that’s them and their healthy and I wouldn’t want it any other way.

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