I’ve been a stay at home mom for over 2 years now. My role as mommy and wife has changed tremendously over the years and in a way, has evolved. Year 1 (0-12 months), I was a nanny off and on, planned our wedding, got into the sleep groove with a new baby, lost my baby weight, started sharing a car with my husband, and searched endlessly for our first house. Year 2 (12 months-2 years), was spent getting settled into our new home, getting used to tantrums, focusing more and more on learning, figuring out the walking thing, starting this glorious blog with one hell of a friend and an out of this world partner, Vanessa, suffering a miscarriage (of course I blogged about it), ending the “sharing a car” era, planning a bad a$$ 2 year birthday party, and being presented with a work from home opportunity for a media company that my BFF happens to own. Which leads me to the purpose of today’s blog.
This amazing, a few hours a week, work from home opportunity I’ve had for the past year has slowly turned into a full blown media planning position of 40 hours/week of work crammed into 20 hours per week, some from the office, some from home, but all while maintaining my position as COO of the Mack home as Mommy and Wifey.
There are a few things I’d like to say today about this new-found working thing.
1. I honestly don’t know how working moms do it. I go into the office one full day, one half day (really only 3 hours), and work the rest from home each week and I am EXHAUSTED on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, and even more so come Friday. Sincerely, I could go to bed at 9 pm every night.
2. I don’t know how every working mom doesn’t have a full time maid, chef, and personal assistant. Again, I’m working 1/2 the amount of a full time employee and I BARELY have the time for a shower let alone laundry, dusting, cooking, or grocery shopping.
3. How do moms have energy for their children at the end of the work day?? Again, peeps… We’re talking 20 hours/week of work and I have to beg my inner super mommy to make an appearance after 5 pm.
Hats off to all you working moms out there! This waking up at 6 am to drive and be punctual is NO joke. I haven’t been on a work schedule in so long and transitioning back into that role is seriously for the birds. Don’t get me wrong, I love working for my BFF and the only reason I do it is because I get to work with my BFF…anywhere or anyone else and I’d HAPPILY stay put at home 7 days/week and never work a day in my life again. It’s a win the way I look at it now, but geez, it’s tough $h!t too!!!
Maybe it’s the fact that even though I’m working part-time I’m still technically a full-time stay at home mom. You see, I work the days Lincoln is in school so all those people that think Mother’s Day Out is a day for mani, pedi’s, and grocery shopping…alone…kid-less, you are SO wrong! Well it may be for some moms, but not for this Mom! I still have to cram all the normal things that are required of being a stay at home mom into the hours between responding to emails and putting together media plans…WHEW!
Kudos to working moms, kudos to stay at home moms…I love both! But obviously I’m much better at one and am still working on becoming great at the other 🙂 I’m still working on my time management skills and making sure everything is taken care of. Sometimes I wish I just had one extra brain and another set of hands… oh and another computer would be great too. The rest is useless.
Are you a working mom? A stay at home mom? Or both like me?!??!
Any advice?
Thank you! This was oh so timely! I too work full-time and am a stay at home mommy to my 5 month old. It’s hard work and nice to know that it’s hard for other people too (and not just me!)
I’ve said it before, but I will say it again – I am more productive because I work. I know that sounds insane, but your time management and ability to prioritize become really good once you get into a groove. I have started to incorporate the idea of “margin” into my life (which is basically creating space for yourself to say “no” to some things that aren’t mandatory), and that helps. Don’t get me wrong – it is HARD, and I rely very much on my husband for help. But once we got into a routine, it just feels like our “normal” – the days where I stay at home (Fridays), I don’t know where the time goes and get 0 done. I can get more done in the 6-8 hours Thatcher is at school than I can do in a weekend – ha! It’s all hard work if you ask me!
I agree it’s hard for all moms! I love posts like this that give a shout out to all moms because it is (duh) so rewarding but also so hard!
It is all hard and rewarding…Allena is right. I can’t imagine anything other than being a stay at home mom, I would suck as a working parent. I admire it all, because there are a lot of moms that I look at and am not sure how they do it. My plate is full, but I know plenty others who have so much more on their plates. Cheers to us ALL!!!!
Thanks for this. People ask how I do it and I always joke that I drink a lot of wine 🙂 All i can say its that it is truly amazing what we do for our kids. I am amazed at all that women do…working mom and working at home moms. Neither job is easy. Both have perks and both have challenges. My cup definitely runneth over…..but I can sleep when I’m dead! Hook Em!
sleep suffers! I think you need to think of yourself as a working mom …because you are. I think all moms have a routine that we define for ourselves. Words have power and by defining yourself as a stay-at-home mom, you are discounting the juggling that has to occur when your schedule is not your own. Your spouse will have to chip in more. Mine has taken over cooking and shopping since I went back. No spouse or unwilling partner ?- there are grocery delivery services and yes, maids are great if you can get one! I also try and find efficiencies for when my husband is out of town. I doubled the number of bottles and cook the kid food ahead of time so I can both cook and clean less. Some people do a once a month cook and freeze routine. Lay out clothes for the week when you are putting away laundry. Take your vitamins and schedule socializing as much during your workday lunches as possible! The other reader has it spot on- time is your most valuable commodity , use it wisely, say no and embrace imperfection. I like the sentiment that you can have it all- just not at the same time . Sometimes the house is clean and sometimes I’m well rested, but not at the same time!