Which Mom Are You?

Do you ever feel that as a mom you get lumped into one giant category that is not representative of your personality at all? Like you bump into people at the airport and they ask where you’re from and you say Austin and this “Ohhh” ensues like they immediately have you pegged as a baby-wearin’, breast- feeding, Keep Austin Weird kind-of mama? Well, we know that ain’t the truth when it comes to being a mom and we thought we’d add some new definitions out there that not only describe our contributors, but other moms out there, too. Take a look at similar blogs we’ve done in this style about strollers and Austin neighborhoods. What can we say? We like definitions!

The Glam Mom: This mom wakes up two hours before her scheduled c-section to curl her hair and put on her makeup. She never leaves home without blush and lipgloss and I’ll be damned if her diaper bag looks anything like a traditional one. She’ll sport stilettos on any date night or girls night out, but if flats are a must, you know they’ll be on this list of fabulous flats. This mom may not know what current events are happening (True Conversation: “Who is Steve Jobs?”) but she definitely knows all of the current pageant winners and most popular models. She never wears her hair in a ponytail and prides herself on big earrings and perfectly wafted hair. She’s always camera ready and always walks as though Fergie’s Glamorous is playing in the background and you might catch her walking extra slow in front of a fan…only if the windblown hair wont get all up in her lipgloss.

The Bad-A-Working Mom: This mom doesn’t go to the bathroom without her iPhone and not because she is playing an intense round of Candy Crush, she fears missing a work email. She gets giddy excited when her company’s Facebook likes grow and can knock out a work product during a thirty-minute episode of Dora the Explorer. She’ll be damned if she leaves the house without her laptop and MiFI (wireless internet) and if multitasking is not involved, she isn’t interested. She lives and dies by her outlook calendar and if a date night isn’t scheduled, it’s not happening. She is likely to be the only mom working during gymnastics class, but she doesn’t care, she can videotape flips and send emails at the same time.

The Crunchy Mom: This mom fits right in here in Austin. She is a baby-wearing, cloth-diapering, breast-feeding-until-the-age-of-three kind-of gal. She scours the internet for coconut oil groupons and if there is a breast feeding rally, her pre-painted sign is ready to go. If it’s not organic, she panics, and you better believe she makes all of her own baby food. You will never catch this mom with anything that will sit in a landfill and when she isn’t making her own laundry detergent, going no-poo, DIYing dishwashing detergent and more, she’s reading about other things she can DIY that will be good for her baby and the earth.

The Master-Thesis Mom: This mom needs a dissertation before she makes a decision that will affect her kiddies. Which pre-school is the right one? Don’t even make a suggestion without providing her with testimonials. Which car seat is the best? Don’t think about saying “Graco” without the research to prove it. You will never catch this mom making a decision on the whim and if her experience doesn’t match the research she read, you better believe she is going to write a review so that other master-thesis moms will know the truth from their like-minded mama friend.

The Sassy Mom: This mama will let you know her opinion, sometimes even when you don’t ask for it. Being assertive and outspoken is not an issue for her, she knows where she stands and isn’t afraid to hide it. Did her kids not get the teacher she wanted, you’ll hear about it. Someone oversteps their boundaries with her family, you’ll hear about it. However, do NOT confuse her sass with complaining, she’s not complaining. She is simply alerting you to the facts that have caused her to have an opinion {usually a strong one} that is accompanied by some attitude.

The Shortcut Mom: This mom wants to get it done and she wants it to be the easy way. What’s for dinner? Take out. What’s for lunch? Left overs. If she can’t get all of her shopping done in one place she’s not happy and you’ll definitely hear about it if her husband is driving home from a restaurant and takes the scenic route. This mom would mail order groceries if it saved her a trip to the local HEB. Don’t mistake her shortcutness for laziness, like a lot of moms, the shortcut mom is about efficiency.

The Thespian Mom: Think Fräulein Maria meets Jack Black in School of Rock for this mom. If there is a way to teach a lesson, calm a kid, give praise or discipline using music, it’s happening in this home. Dealing with a stressed out baby? Sing him a tune. Dealing with a colicky baby? Sing her a tune. Music is the solution and it works like an acapella charm. In her spare time this mom may rock the stage in a local musical or make her kids a CD singing the presidents names and she’ll be way bummed if she’s somewhere her Spotify doesn’t work. In one word she’s Acamazing.

The Fashionista Mom: This mom is related to the glam mom, but has a bit of a twist. She’s always on trend, rarely on budget, and has multiples of EVERYTHING. She scours the internet for the rising fashion statements and doesn’t buy one to try it out, she buys it in every color. Think about Gretchen trying to make “fetch” happen, this mom is trying to make fashion happen. And the fashion doesn’t stop short at workout gear either…just take a look at all those Lululemon skorts! This mom is a tad bit on the materialistic side when it comes to her personal belongings, but underneath the latest runway trend is a sweet, down-to-earth personality. She is also responsible for our Fashion Friday posts that you can read here, here and here.

The Energizer-Bunny Mom: Where is the coffee? This mom needs it {Well, don’t all moms need it?} From sun-up until her head hits the pillow, this mom is one million miles a minute. Soccer and swimming at the same time? No sweat, she can get both places within minutes with her lightning fast speed (while maintaining the speed limit, of course.) Lollygagging is this mom’s pet peeve and if it’s one of her own crew taking the snails pace…Austin, we have a problem. “Get with the Program” is her motto and you have to hurry, there are memories to be made.

The Party-of-Six Mom: Cars that only hold four people? Please. This mom has four under seven and needs an appropriately sized road-dominating vehicle. This mom’s BFF is Costco. Family Dinner portions are just right in this home and when it comes to playing sports, this family is an entire basketball team plus an alternate. Two kids per parents is what’s on this mom’s mind and they handle it in style. At times it feels like a traveling circus, but that was the plan. Walk into this house and you can guarantee someone is crying (maybe mommy!) but looking on the bright side, this mom burns more calories than the others because 10/10 one of them is on her hip. Chaos is a normalcy that doesn’t hold back this momma from enjoying the outdoors, shopping, and new adventures with all four kids in tow.

Now, you tell us…what mom are you?

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