For most of women, finding out they’re expecting is exciting. Finding out you’re expecting when you were taking measures to avoid pregnancy, however, is terrifying. Super terrifying. Even more so if you aren’t married. And it’s exponentially worse if the day before you find out you’re expecting, you go over to your “not-technically boyfriend’s” house and tell him you wouldn’t want to be with him if he was the last man on Earth. And of course, when you told him that, you stormed out of his house in a very dramatic fashion, complete with a slamming screen door, because that’s how things like that are done.

That was my story when I found out I was pregnant with my son, Grady.

Oops.

And that’s how I began my very uncoordinated stumble through parenthood.

photo credit :: All Heart Photography
photo credit :: All Heart Photography

I grew up in Circle C Ranch (shout out to southwest Austin!), and had a very typical childhood. I was always a little on the dorky side, but by the time high school and college rolled around, I learned to use my blunt sense of humor to win people over. When the time came for me to leave for college, I took the same stance that most melodramatic teenage girls take when they are lovingly shoved out of the nest: I’m never coming back. I moved to College Station, where I attended Texas A&M and remained content in “smallish town” Texas for nearly eight years. College Station is where I was living, blissfully self-centered and carefree, when I discovered I was pregnant.

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When I was about 6 months pregnant, I made the very difficult decision to move back to Austin and into my parents’ house, although I guess technically, the decision was made for me. My family was pretty adamant that I needed to be near them, and they were right. Grady’s biological father {you may remember him as my “not-technically boyfriend”} had moved to Houston, and it was becoming increasingly clear that he was taking a very hands-off approach to parenthood. So, after years of swearing I’d never move back to Austin, I ended up eating my words, along with just about everything else I could find.

Don’t judge. Pregnancy is a very hungry business, y’all.

My pregnancy was not an easy one. It was riddled with stress, uncertainty, and preterm labor that began at 20 weeks and didn’t stop until I was 35 weeks along. Throughout my entire pregnancy, I was very anxious about my abilities as a mother. I had absolutely no maternal instinct. I was always the cynic and the smart aleck of the group. I was not affectionate. I also knew I couldn’t count on much help from the paternal side of things. How the heck was I going to handle the job of motherhood?! I was terrified.

After weeks of stress, insomnia, and bed rest, it happened. Grady was born at 2:54am on November 13, 2011. He was 6lbs 11oz of perfection, complete with two amazing cowlicks that caused his thick strawberry blonde hair to form the best mohawk I’ve ever seen.

photo credit :: Live Dream Amore Photography
photo credit :: Live Dream Amore Photography

When Grady was 4 months old, his biological father began the process of terminating his parental rights. It had been fairly apparent since Grady was born that this was the way our family would eventually end up, but it suddenly became official. That is how I became not just a single parent, but also an “only parent.” Just like everything else that life has thrown at us, we decided to just take it all in stride.

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Since having Grady and becoming an only parent, I’ve had to completely start over. Becoming Mom has created a lot of obstacles, but it has also brought me more joy than I could have ever imagined. Over time, I’ve managed to not only be Grady’s mom, but be pretty darn good at it, too. I’ve learned a lot, but mostly I’ve learned to redefine the word “family.” Families come in many forms, but where there’s love and laughter, there’s family.

Over the past three and half years, the two of us have weathered every storm, and we always come out stronger because of it.

photo credit :: All Heart Photography
photo credit :: All Heart Photography

But wait. Who the heck is that bearded gentleman?! That’s the newbie to our family: my boyfriend, Danny. We’ve spent the past year hazing and initiating him into our crazy little family. He actually thinks he can handle us and our shenanigans.

Our story isn’t the perfect fairy tale, but we wouldn’t have it any other way.


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