17 Things Boy Moms Should Know

BOY [boi] n. 1. a noise with dirt on it.

Mamas this definition is SPOT on, and you will love this sweet little noise with dirt on it more than you ever thought you could love anything, EVER. Here are a few more things that describe what being a boy mom is like most days.

  • They have endless energy. Seriously, boys will run circles around you for hours. Even when exhaustion hits they try to keep going, and will fight you tooth and nail to play for “just three more minutes mommy.”

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  • They are rough and tough and have no fear. I get a hug from my nieces and it’s soft and sweet and gentle. A hug from my boy is more like a running tackle that takes me to the ground. And they have no fear of jumping, falling and running smack into things. Get ready for your heart and stomach to do flips watching them.

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  • They get lots of bruises, bumps, stitches and broken bones, get ready. We’ve had stitches in my son’s forehead twice already, and more mysterious bumps and bruises than I can count.
  • Trucks, planes, cars, trains. Boys love things with wheels, actually anything that moves. My son is fascinated by the trash truck; so fascinated that he currently wants to be a trash man when he grows up. He also LOVES his nerf gun. All of those cliché things that are labeled as boy toys are mostly true.
  • They like “girl” toys too. My son loves to play with his cousin’s baby dolls, play kitchen and Barbie house. And there is nothing wrong with that.
  • They learn differently and at a different pace than girls. For so long after my son was born I was constantly comparing his milestones with his cousin’s. She is two weeks older than he is, so I thought they should be about the same. THEY ARE NOT. They are actually more like complete opposites. Boys and girls learn in completely different ways and at different speeds. Don’t compare. It will make you crazy…like me.
  • Cute clothes do exist. It is often said that cute clothes don’t really exist for boys, but they do!! There just aren’t as many, and sometimes you have to get more creative with putting together a perfect outfit. Shoes though, they are easy and there are plenty of cute ones out there. My son’s favorite pair of shoes at the moment are some vintage cowboy boots we got in Wimberley for $14!! Like nice leather boots {that are two sizes too big, because I want them to last longer than 6 months!} for dirt-cheap.
  • They will pee anywhere and everywhere. Boys pee, a lot. And they don’t always have great aim. In fact, lets be honest, they have terrible aim no matter what their age. Be prepared for pee in, on and around the toilet. Also be prepared for them to be willing to pee anywhere. On the bush, on the tree, on the side of the house, ON the ocean (not in, but on), on anything else they can get away with peeing on.
  • Penis love starts as soon as they can reach it. It’s just a fact. Be ready. It will happen way sooner than you think.
  • They love farts, burps and boogers. My son informed me the other day, “boys pick their noses, mommy. They just do.” This was after I had reminded him for the 10th time to get his finger out of his nose. He also thinks farts are hilarious (along with his father). He started giggling at farts before he could actually say more than 3 words.
  •  Dirt, stinky feet, grass stains, mud just happen, and right from the start. A love of dirt, muddy puddles and lack of care about being dirty are in their DNA. And how my son’s feet are already stinky at the sweet age of three is beyond me. That kid can knock people out with his stinky shoes and then amaze them with his ability to find a muddy puddle anywhere.

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  • They are noise machines. Their toys make noise. They make noise. They don’t understand “inside voice” to save their lives. And they like to use this ability in the most inopportune moments. Like when you see a man with a big belly at the mall and your son screams “Mommy look! That man has a baby in his belly!!”
  • They are bottomless pits when eating. Some days my son eats like a bird, but most days this is NOT the case. He can pack more food away than I can easily.

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  • Being naked is just FINE. If given the choice my son would not wear clothes…EVER.
  • Almost everyone will tell you “they look just like their daddy!” even if they are your spitting image. If I have one of my baby pictures handy I usually disprove them, but most of the time I just let it go.

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  • Sticks, rocks and boxes are the BEST presents ever. You know that shiny new toy you got him, five minutes after opening it he’ll probably get bored and start playing with the box in came with.
  •  They love their Mommas the MOST. Okay this may not just be a boy thing and it may not really be true all the time. But I like to think it is.

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1 COMMENT

  1. Placing a contour rug BEHIND the toilet will save much time scrubbing that hard to reach area. The rug won’t fit. And that’s good, so that the extra part can fold up at the 90* angle to protect the wall, too.

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