My kid dresses better than me

It happened quietly while I wasn’t looking. I didn’t mean for it to happen. For goodness sake I used to work at a very popular retail store while I was in college. But, as sure as the sun rises in the East and sets in the West, my good fashion sense has somehow disappeared since I’ve become a mom. Two recent incidences brought me to this realization.

Incident one

The first was when I went back to my hometown in Ohio for a friend’s wedding. We all met up one morning with our kids to enjoy some local coffee when one of my friend’s mom walked in.  I love this woman and looked up to her a lot as a kid. She was my first track coach. She saw in me a great talent for running in consecutive circles around a track. I aspired (still aspire) to be athletic like her.

On this fine morning, I noticed that she and I were wearing the exact same shirt and had similar athletic shorts and running shoes. I immediately commented my love of her outfit and realized I now dress like the moms in my life. The best part was, I wasn’t upset about this outfit or realization at all. It felt like I had come full circle in my mommy-hood. I was a part of some special moms only club.

The second incident, didn’t leave me feeling as proud.

One day, not too long ago, my hubby invited me to tag along to a work related outing at Top Golf. I asked him if I could stay in the athletic outfit I had worn all day; i.e. running shorts, sports bra, tank and my Brooks running shoes. He advised not to. He did say however, that he was going to come home and switch from his suit into a polo and nicer shorts.

I took that as a green light to wear jean shorts, a “nicer” shirt and some flats. I drew the line at having to do my hair or makeup. We were after all just going to Top Golf. Sadly when I walked into the room, I realized I should have put on a dress, or at the very least makeup.

Everyone was dressed very business casual. I suddenly felt the self shame that can sometimes come from being a formerly successful working woman to just a “stay-at-home mom.” I felt frumpy. Suddenly my “cute” outfit, looked about 5 years out of style. I headed over to the bar and got my free glass (okay two glasses) of Moscato and told myself I have zero cares. In truth, I mostly have zero cares, but I do have a little bit of regret for my outfit choice.

In the end it didn’t really matter. No one said anything negative or even really looked in my direction. I don’t work for them so it didn’t really matter how I looked. Plus, I’m sure I was one of the most comfortable people there on the 90 degree afternoon.

The mom look of 2017

When one becomes a mom, especially a stay-at-home mom, it is very easy to fall into the trap of messy hair don’t care and, go-to athletic gear. In fact, most moms I see out and about on a regular week day are wearing some form of what I’m wearing. After all, isn’t it the dream? I mean this was one of the things I looked forward to most when I decided to stay home after years of having to dress up for work. The ability to walk around in my most comfortable clothes is something that I cherish daily. That being said, I sometimes wonder, what does it say about me and my self-worth that my son is often dressed better than me? I try not to think about that too much.

My kid dresses better than me. I make sure that my son is always wearing matching shorts and shirts. He generally also has cute little matching shoes, and a clean face and hair. This is an especially hard feat to accomplish as he is prone to smashing banana into his hair. He’s just so darn cute and part of his cuteness is dressing him in cute little outfits.

Now I do occasionally put on makeup or do my hair. I can’t lie. In those moments it feels nice to look and feel pretty again. But in the end, I LOVE MY SPORTS WEAR!

I asked for and received a gift card from Academy Sports for my birthday. It is currently burning a hole in my pocket. I can’t wait to buy more shorts, running shirts, and sports bras (the good kind with the adjustable straps). However, after realizing I still own jeans, and admittedly a lot of clothes from 10+ years ago (thanks Facebook Time-Hop thing),  I told myself I will try to make an effort to at least bring my wardrobe into the year 2017.

So, here’s to hoping I stick to this new life plan, but if I don’t, meh I still have zero cares. I like being me in all of my sports wear, messy hair in a ponytail and no makeup glory.  

Veronica DeSantos Ryan
Hi Austin mamas! I am Veronica DeSantos Ryan, a mama from Round Rock. My husband and I moved to the area in 2014 and love every minute of it. Our baby Oliver (May 2016) is the light of our life and we are enjoying every minute with him. After spending seven years teaching, I decided that I wanted to be a stay at home mom and teacher of life to my little boy. As a family we love running with Ollie in his jogger stroller, having picnics outside, playing with our two dogs and exploring all the the Austin area has to offer! I am also a performing princess for Lexi's Little Princesses Princess company, a teaching artist at The Georgetown Palace Theatre, and a member of the singing group The Vintage Dreams. I am an avid reader, piano player, singer, and occasional actress in community theater, and have recently been published in Chicken Soup for the Soul: Miracles and More.

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