One hundred days ago I decided it was time to re-examine my relationship with alcohol. In the past 100 days, I’ve had two glasses of wine. If we were talking about a 100 day period earlier in the year, I would have likely had over 100 glasses of wine.
Here are a few things I’ve discovered in the past 100 days:
I came-up with way too many reasons to drink.
Once I wasn’t doing it, I realized how many activities and events I associated with drinking. Plane rides. Football
games season. Concerts. Baby showers. Weddings. Pedicures. Work events. Toddler meltdowns. Sunday Funday. Wine Down Wednesday. All the things. But you know what? After doing them one by one without drinking, they’re even better. I know, I was shocked too. Good news is, I’m still fun (thank goodness, this was a legit concern of mine). And I remember the fun. And I appreciate the fun.
People have lots of questions, and that’s a good thing.
Being open and writing about my unhealthy relationship with wine has made it really easy to talk about openly – with friends, family, colleagues and even old middle school friends on Facebook. And putting it all out there means opening the topic up for discussion and questions. What does your husband think? Are you going to quit, forever? Did something bad happen? Do you think you’re an alcoholic? Can’t you just have one glass a week/only drink outside of the house/only drink on special occasions/your birthday/New Years/my birthday/my dinner party/my shower?
In the beginning, I’d get defensive or worry about how to answer some of the questions. But then I realized that after the questions, came the….”I’m in the same boat” or the “I’m struggling with the same thing” or the best, the “I’m really proud of you” and the “here’s what worked for me.” I’ve also realized I’m in this for the long-game, and it’s OK not to know how to define the problem/the journey or how to answer all the questions. So bring on the questions! We should have more conversations like this.
There’s a lot of other people that don’t drink.
Brothers, husbands, best friends, colleagues, everyone knows someone in their life that doesn’t drink. And it’s been so cool to hear about all those someones and about their decisions. I’ve also discovered several online communities of super sober people. From podcasts focused on sobriety and creativity, sober parenting and on and on, to Instagram hashtags to mainstream articles and blog posts, there’s a growing group showing others it’s possible to live your life alcohol-free. And it’s cool to talk about it openly. And it’s OK to talk about the fact that quitting all together is easier than just having one glass a week for some of us.
I’m basically a millionaire now.
Did you know you can go to a restaurant with three people and your bill can be under $40? It’s true. I don’t want to know the actual amount of money I’ve saved in the past 100 days, but it’s significant. And I’ll probably go spend the savings on Korean face masks or Gabby Bernstein books, but hey, I’m still going to count it as savings net net.